I suppose others have it worse than I do, because so many things in my life are stable, sturdy, and unchanging... I suppose that if nothing else I have that much to be thankful for...I have a place to live, food, and best of all, relative comfort.
But what I don't have is a connection, a spark.... someone that I can really bear my soul to. Part of me believes that she will eventually fill that void, and be the person who I start seeing... I don't WANT it to be that way...she's too far, too quiet... but when I'm around her, it's easy to be happy.
I feel like I'm missing something though... like I'm forgetting that there is some hidden subtext to everything that I want, and how it's somehow unattainable.
Part of me simply wishes that I was able to do more for those around me... but I don't orgasm money, so all my options are really drying up rapidly in that area.
I was told once that good things happen to good people... I am still waiting for evidence.